Primal Grandmother

Something deeply primal & instinctual happens at the birth of ones first
grandchild. Yet another life thing nobody informed me about. Oh - they told
me how fun grandkids are -they told me how they wish they'd had them first...
None of them said anything about the deep, gut, primal thing that happened when
I saw that baby. It must come from the time when the women of the tribe banded
together in support of the birthing mother & new babe.

That baby that looks & feels & smells so much like a child
I birthed 25 years ago...The child standing right beside
me. yet... not quite... I am so incredibly proud of that son -
now father - of mine! The patience, strength, courage &
love he showed her. That primal response to that baby... It is one of the strangest, most powerful things
I've ever experienced... and I am *so* grateful....

So - welcome to our lives sweet baby Hunter!!! I'll do my best
to be a Nana you enjoy ~ a Nana who ~ when you are grown &
I am gone ~ you'll remember our times & smile.

July

Since I'm back on the horse - it seems - let's talk about July a bit.

MICHAEL'S BIRTHDAY!

My beautiful baby boy is no longer a teenager. AMAZING.
I drove to Lewiston to surprise him for his birthday. It was great. Sometimes surprising people is a good thing - sometimes - not so much...I was delighted that this time was a very good thing.
This happy, creative, brilliant, energetic boy has always been such a joy to me.
His capacity for caring, connection, tenderness & compassion astound me.
I have always been grateful his light came to shine in my world.Marilyn came again for Goddess Fest. Outstanding belly dancers. Mostly we just sat & watched the people pass. I had my palm read. I must do at least one such thing every year. I missed Shawn. Happy anniversary, my friend.July was hot & dry. Our garden fails. My sweet peas fail.
All things wilt as the end of the month got the better of me

Michael & Trisha came to finish out the month with us. Always such a grand joy & adventure!

Plunged into darkness...

1/2 the year is gone. Odd to be so glad, but I'll be glad when this year is over. Not enough to not enjoy it - but glad just the same.

There were amazing & wonderful thunder storms.Wet & cool.

The garden struggles. I wonder if the sweet peas will really make it up the arch.
I have lilies, beautiful roses & I love my little daisies.
The hot tub has arrived - but it will be awhile before it is ready to play in.

It's good to have plans.

Michael & Trisha moved to Lewiston. I miss having them handy.
I got to help get the new West Branch Library! ready to roll. It was great to be back in the books again.
Summer solstice sent me into mourning. I hate losing those 2 minutes of daylight a day. As Gaile said 'We're being plunged into darkness'! (Solstice at Stonehenge - how awesome would *that* be!!!)

Must have been a good month for dying...

Ed McMahon


Farrah Fawcett
Michael Jackson
Billy D. Mays
Fred Travalena





Ahhh....men... they just don't die when you want them to...(Suzanne Finnamore & me)

My beautiful best friend graduated from her first year of study with Science of Mind. I'm WAY proud of her!!!
This month's highlight was Nathan turning 25. We had a great gathering to celebrate. Nathan has always been a celebration to me. I celebrated him every moment since I knew he was coming into my world. I treasured every minute I held his warm little body against me. I held him every moment I possibly could. Nathan came with a huge, kind heart, a generous compassionate soul - & just a little mischief. I am so incredibly proud & grateful for this son of mine.

my plans...

May

May was Prom for the most beautiful girl in the world...
ever...


My blessed best friend & kids showing up for Mother's Day.It was GRADUATIONS!!!



I only made it to Dayna's. And to Trisha's party. It's a good thing the
3 Halverson grads reluctantly humored me for that picture.

I've learned I can make pancakes!
Edible pancakes!
I may even decide to try waffles next!
or maybe not.


Pink & I have our 'garden' in. Gnomes and all!
I just didn't have the wherewithall to dig grass, haul stone, fill dirt & plant.
So, yes, those are pots. AND we have strawberries!
The pool is for Brillo. His very own piggie garden.
AND - our beautiful Hope came 'out' on myspace!Nana Z is anxiously awaiting the arrival of little
Hunter William Tolman in Oct.!!!

Those are the highlights. Let's stick with those.

Welcome June! May you bring better things.

especially for sunday...

ok...
Not exactly out of the cave -
But I've found some great stuff in here...

caves

Obviously I'm going back to paper gratitudes...

I'm in a cave...

Memorial Day...

This is the first memorial day I haven't decorated graves
in Twin, Paul & Rupert with Michael. I feel badly. I missed it.

Some days the only gratitude one can muster is being
grateful that all days aren't like this one.

Sunday, Sunday...

1. I am so, SO grateful for peaceful Sundays....
something practically unheard of in a former life.
It is beyond wonderful to enjoy my Sundays!
2. Foals!
One of the advantages of driving with Pink.
I get to see the farmland & the babies!



3. Ready to start Pink's garden!!!
4. Jelly bellies are so much fun!
Trying to figure out what the good & the icky ones are.
There must be some kind of game in there somewhere!5. 3 day weekends! I get another home-day tomorrow!
It's awesome to have a home to love being at... *contented sigh*

Hepa filters & the ill

What's up with hepa filters???

These things they have stuck in my vacuum, that are supposed to filter out alergens
or some such - that I must take out - take outside & bang on a rock.

Do you KNOW what happens when you bang these things on rocks? Dust & hair &
every other thing in them flies EVERYWHERE! Mostly in my direction. Like smoke.
Grief!

So these things are good for everyone EXCEPT the one who does the work...
great... wonderful.
It's like being the one with the wrong color uniform on Star Trek....

Like I'm not already stuffy, headachey, hacking & coughing with no voice.It was a man... I know it was...

A few hours late...

I was just too ... just too... last night to get on.
Besides - Pink & Sade ordered me to bed.
Wouldn't even let me start the breakfast bread.
So it's cereal this morning.

That's #1. Pink & Sade's caring.
2. A good afternoon with Michael & Trisha & Justin.
Michael & I had a great nap on the floor.
The picnic was sidelined to the house,
because it looked like a great storm was on the way... which it wasn't.
3. This is a long weekend. Maybe I'll get it together by Tuesday.
4. Kids that are easy to please. BLESS them!!!
5. Pina coladas...